"You can always press delete"

We live in a world where relationships are different, in a world where “till death do us apart” type of romantic relationship is being replaced by more shallow, fast and replaceable type of relationship between men and women. Some time ago I read Zygmunt Bauman book Liquid Love where he explained that once known stable old-fashioned romantic relationships are through and that younger generation are looking for relationships that are stable and durable as long as they give both partners their benefit; as soon as the benefit is over for at least one side, the relationship has no future.

“In our world of rampant individualization relationships are mixed blessings. They vacillate between dream and nightmare, and there is no telling when one turns in the other,” Bauman explains. He goes further and writes that one expert counselor said that when committing yourself, however halfheartedly, remember that you are likely to be closing the door to other romantic possibilities which may be more satisfying and fulfilling. As he continues the promises of commitment are meaningless in the long term ... Like other investments they way and wane. So if you wish to relate, keep your distance; if you want fulfillment from your togetherness, do not make or demand commitments. Keep all your doors open at any time.

In addition he asks himself are the resident of the modern liquid world really after relationships that hold, as they say they are, or do they, more than anything else, desire those relationships to be light and loose and could be thrown aside at any moment.

He also highlights the fact that people are rather than talking about “relating” and “relationships” speak ever more often of connections, of “connecting” and “being connected”. Instead talking about partners they prefer to speak about “networks”. Connections are virtual relations, he explains and unlike old-fashioned relationships, they seem to be made to the measure of a liquid modern life setting where “romantic possibilities” are supposed and hoped to come and go with ever greater speed and in never thinning crowds, “stampeding each other off the stage and out-shouting each other with promises to be more satisfying and fulfilling”. Virtual relationships are, unlike real ones, easy to enter and exit, plus they look clean and smart, feel easy to use and user-friendly, when compared with the heavy, slow-moving, inert messy “real stuff”.

These are only few inserts of a really complex book of modern liquid world and modern liquid love relationships that I wanted to share with you – I think relationships are frequent talk theme nowadays and interesting for man and women.

I want to conclude with Ralph Waldo Emerson’s claim: “When skating on a thin ice your salvation is in speed. When quality lets you down, you tend to seek redemption in quantity.” I just want to add here that not everything is that pessimistic. As Metka Kuhar, PhD, once wrote, it is true that relationships are likely to end sooner nowadays (because every partner in that relationships is aware of its rights and needs), but those same relationships are more fulfilling, quality and intensive.